Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Boys Are From Pluto - Girls Are From Neptune

"Boys Are From Pluto - Girls Are From Neptune"," Please allow me to share with you the vast differences in these mind boggling encounters and you might reach the same conclusion that I have - little boys and little girls are VERY different, right from the beginning. Almost in synchronized harmony, a cacophony of little girl voices called out ""Hello, Brooke's Mom!"" I was then nearly trampled by Brooke's chattering friends as they all clamored with inquiries to sit with Brooke at the honored table of ""Parent Visitors"". The next day, I entered my 8 year old son's room, high on the intoxicating welcome I had received in my daughter's room and pumped up with confidence of a reception equivalent to royalty. My son, Jarod, didn't get up, greet me or otherwise acknowledge my arrival other than the nearly imperceptible nod of the head that I would have missed had I blinked at that exact moment. I stood there in the doorway limp, not sure what to do with myself. And so I stood there with a leaking eye and an empty purpose until the teacher lined everyone up for lunch. She even shushed me when I tried to ask her a question. When I tried to shush them and straighten them out, I was instructed by their teacher to ""Please keep the boys under control"". I did not want to be in charge of the boys. So I pretended I didn't hear their guffaws and concentrated on not getting tripped down the hall. The Lunch: Brooke and her gaggle of girls sat in a flurry of pink lunch boxes and giggles. Once seated, they swarmed over me, chattering without pause about their latest Webkins acquisitions, their names, clothing, preferred foods, best friends and birthdays. But, I listened intently, my neck twisting left to right trying to absorb each girl's litany of important details as my head started pounding. Oh, boy, and this is only first grade. Samuel moved Ben's chair at the last moment and he crashed to the floor. As I grew up with only a sister, I was vastly unprepared for boy talk and boy humor. Samuel ended every comment with the phrase ""And then he got his head chopped off and got killed"". I am not a complete rube and I was well aware that my son, on a normal day where his mother was not hovering at his elbow, would normally participate in these disgusting and hilarious topics. . WHAT'S UP  
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